a narrative about self

Recently my friend shared a post on how people tell stories and how they potrya themselves in those stories reveals a lot about themselves ....Some are heros in their stories , some are victims , the narrative about self goes on to create your personality ......And so the author says he will have stories in which he is happy .......Can that really help m sitting.on a Friday morning dreading office work ,,this has become a routine now every morning the dread a sinKing feeling in the stomach, how I envy people who have lot of friends and look forward to being in office , why am.i not that enthusiastic ......Is it lethargy or is it some.thing deeper , I don't trust my self enough to give me the luxury of thinKing this is something deeper , m too busy repeating the narration that I have heard from everyone , you are lazy, lethargic . Secondly I have observed that I am too distracted am not living in the present , when am physically present mentally am far off thinking something else. This habit of ruminating thoughts is a big contributor to stress.....Your though t and action have to be aligned for you to be at peace ....It's not been happening for quite some time now . Even while.meditating I was far off mentally 

Do.i quit this all for.mental peace and go away or.do I stay and fight ....Will I learn to overcome these thought habits .